Extra Christmas Present

 When I went into the Urgent Care the morning after Christmas and sat in the hallway lined up with people wanting COVID tests after hanging out with their families less than 24 hours before I was irritated.  I could not stop peeing and it hurt every time.  I thought I had a urinary tract infection and was in pain while all these people just wanted a test which would not even be accurate.  I waited for over two hours just to be called back into a room.  The PA walked in and said I do not know if this is happy or bad news but you do not have a UTI you are pregnant.



I honestly do not know how I felt in that moment, I smiled, I cried, I was nervous, I was scared, this was not what I wanted right now.  Yes, I always wanted to be a mother and eventually have kids but we had only been married 2 weeks.  What about all of our vacations we were going to take?  What about the freedom we had to just be partners and grow deeper in love?  Would this love grow or fizzle because something so drastic was happening so quickly?

I got in my car and called my best friend immediately and was crying.  She was very excited for me but I did not feel excited.  I called my dad, he did not answer.  I called my sister, she did not answer.  I called my aunt and she was just as thrilled as Crystal.  Matt kept calling wanting to know where I was at as we were now going on 3 hours since I left.  I still did not believe the test from the Urgent Care so I went to CVS and got more tests as well as a gift bag.  I put the positive one from the doctors in there and came home and told Matt that I had an extra Christmas present for him and gave him the bag with the test in it.  He kind of looked at the strip and did not know what it was.  Surprise, it is not a UTI, it is a baby.  This is not how I envisioned telling him we were pregnant.  I wanted to have his friend hide a hockey jersey in his bag at the hockey game and me be in the stands with a sign saying "Daddy's #1 fan" with an arrow to my stomach when I would eventually become pregnant.  However, I had to tell him.  We were set to go to an event that night and he would wonder why I was not drinking or why I was pretty emotionless or even more so full of emotion that I did not know how to express or regulate at this moment.  He seemed very shocked and emotionless as well.  I wished it had been a different reaction from both of us, but we chose this life together two weeks previously and we will get through it together.




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